And in case you want to cut and paste this poem, here it is in regular text:
I hate the way you talk to me
And the way you cut your hair.
I hate the way you drive my car.
I hate it when you stare.
I hate your big dumb combat boots
And the way you read my mind.
I hate you so much it makes me sick --
It even makes me rhyme.
I hate the way you're always right.
I hate it when you lie.
I hate it when you make me laugh --
Even worse when you make me cry.
I hate it when you're not around
And the fact that you didn't call.
But mostly I hate the way I don't hate you --
Not even close, not even a little bit, not even at all.
(I know it's not an actual Shakespearean sonnet as they were suppose to write in class, but oh well it still kicks butt and it rules!)
Here's the poem that the teacher recited in class to demonstrate a sonnet.
Sonnet No. 141
In faith, I do not love thee with mine eyes,
For they in thee a thousand errors note,
But tis my heart that loves what they despise,
Who in despite of view is pleased to dote.
Nor are mine eares with thy tongues tune delighted,
Nor tender feeling to base touches prone,
Nor taste, nor smell-desire to be invited
To any sensual feast with thee alone;
But my five wits, nor my five senses can
Dissuade my foolish heart from serving thee,
Who leaves unswayed the likeness of a man,
Thy proud hearts slave and vassal wretch to be:
Only my plague, thus far I count my gain,
That she that makes me sin-awards me pain,
Bianca - There's a difference between like and love. I like my Sketchers. But I love my Prada backpack.
Chastity - But I love my Sketchers.
(pause) Bianca - That's because you don't have a Prada backpack.
Mr. Stratford - I delivered a set of twins to a fifteen-year-old this morning. You know what she said to me?
Bianca - I'm a crack whore who should have made my skeezy boyfriend wear a condom?
Mr. Stratford - Close, but no. She said, "I should have listened to my father!"
Bianca - She did not.
Mr. Stratford - Well, that's what she would have said if she hadn't been so doped up.
Cameron - Yeah, yeah, I noticed she's (Katarina) a little... antisocial. Why is that?
Bianca - Unsolved Mystery.
Cameron - I thought you hated those people (A-list people).
Michael - Yeah, but that was before I knew I had a shot at being one.
Katarina - You never give up do you?
Patrick - So are you saying yes?
Katarina - No.
Patrick - Then are you saying no?
Katarina - No!
Patrick - Cameron, do you like the girl?
Cameron - Yeah.
Patrick - And is she worth all this trouble?
Cameron - Well, I thought she was, but, you know...
Patrick - Well, she is or she isn't. First of all, Joey's not half the man you are. Secondly, don't let anyone ever make you feel like you don't deserve what you want. Go for it.
Bianca - Laisse-moi te demander une question, Cameron. Quand me demanderas-tu de sortir avec toi?
(Translation: Let me ask you a question, Cameron. When are you going to ask me out?< hr width="60%"> Mr. Stratford - Oh, I'm down, I've got the 411. And you are not going out and getting jiggy with some boy. I don't care how dope his ride is.
Mr. Stratford - Fathers don't like to admit when their daughters are capable of running their own lives. It means we've become spectators. Bianca still lets me play a few innings. You've had me on the bench for years. And when you go to Sarah Lawrence (a college), I won't even be able to watch the game.
Katarina - You can't just buy me a guitar every time you screw up, you know.
Patrick - Yeah, I know. But there's always drums and a bass, and maybe even some day a tambourine.
Katarina - And don't just think you can ---
(Patrick kisses Katarina and they embrace)
(Bianca punches Joey in the nose)
Joey - Sh*t Bianca! I'm shooting a nose spray ad tomorrow!
Bianca - That's for making my date bleed.
(She hits him again)
Bianca - That's for my sister
(She knees him in the groin)
Bianca - And that's for me!
Katarina - How'd you get a tux at the last minute?
Patrick - Just something I had, you know. Lying around. Where'd you get the dress?
Katarina - Just something I had, you know. Lying around.
(dressed in a prom dress)
Bianca - Bye Daddy!
Mr. Stratford - Stop. Turn. Explain.
Bianca - Okay, remember how you said I could date if Kat dated? Well, she found this guy, who's actually kind of perfect for her, which is actually kind of perfect for me, because Cameron asked me to the prom and I really wanted to go, and now that Kat went, I'm allowed to -- based on the aforementioned rule and it's previous stipulations, of course.
Cameron - Nice to meet you. (extends hand out to Mr. Stradford to shake)
(Bianca pulls Cameron away and out the door)
Bianca - Let's go
Bianca - Can we for two seconds ignore the fact that you are severely unhinged and discuss my need for a night of teenage normalcy?
Mr. Stratford - And what's normal? Those damn Dawson's River kids, sleeping in each other's beds and what not?
(Bianca is pulling an arrow back on a bow, taking aim)
Joey - Hey there, Cupid.
Bianca - Hey Joey.
Joey - You're concentrating awefully hard, considering it's gym class.
(Bianca releases her grip on the string and sends the arrow soaring into Mr. Chapin's buttocks!)
Bianca - Aha! Black panties.
Cameron - What does that tell us?
Bianca - She wants to have sex some day that's what.
Cameron - She..she..she could just like the color.
Bianca - You don't buy black lingerie unless you want someone to see it.
Cameron - Oh. So.. uh... can I see your room?
Bianca - No! (pause) A girl's room is very personal.
Cameron - Alright first thing, Kat hates smokers
Patrick - So you're telling me I'm a non-smoker
Michael - Yes, well just for now
Cameron - Oh uh and there's another problem, Bianca says that Kat likes pretty guys
Patrick - Are you telling me I'm not a pretty guy
Michael - He's very pretty, this is a gorgeous guy.
Cameron - I just wasn't sure you know, I didn't know.
Michael - The last party I went to was at Chuck E. Cheese, you want to talk about some good times, that was some fun, he he he.
Katarina - Hey your eyes have a little green in them.
(Kat and Pat are about to kiss)
Mr. Morgan - Yes Miss I have an opinion about everything?
Katarina - Do you want this in Iambic Pentameter?
Mr. Morgan - You're not going to fight me on this?
Katarina - No, I think it's a really good assignment.
Mr. Morgan - You're just messing with me aren't you?
Katarina - No I'm really looking forward to writing it.
Mr. Morgan - Get out of my class!
Katarina - What?
Mr. Morgan - Out, get out!
Joey - Thanks Mr. Morgan
Mr. Morgan - Shut up
Patrick - You're right, she's still pissed.
Michael - Sweet love, renew thy force!
Patrick - Hey! Don't say sh*t like that to me, people can hear you.
Cameron - Look, you embarrassed the girl, sacrifice yourself on the alter of dignity and even the score.
(Pat walks away)
Michael - Listen, don't say sh*t like that to him, people can hear you.< hr width="60%"> Joey - Uh, Mr. Morgan, is there any chance we can get Kat to take her Midol before she comes to class?
Mr. Morgan - Some day, you're going to get b*tched slapped and I'm not going to do a thing to stop it (turns to Kat) And Kat, I want to thank you for your point of view, I know how difficult it must be for you to over come all those years of upper middle class oppression, it must be tough, but the next time you storm the PTA crusading for better lunch meat or whatever you white girls complain about, ask them why they can't buy a book written by a black man.
White Bob Marley Wannabes - That's right MON!
Mr. Morgan - Don't even get me started on you two.
Patrick - You're not afraid of me are you?
Katarina - Afraid of you? Why would I be afraid of you?
Patrick - Well most people are.
Katarina - Well I'm not
Patrick - Well maybe you're not afraid of me, but I'm sure you've thought of me naked (wink)
Katarina - (sarcastically) Am I that transparent? I want you, I need you, oh baby, oh baby.
Mr. Stratford - You're 18, you don't know what you want, and you won't know what you want till you're 45, and even if you get it, you'll be too old to use it.
Bianca - Where'd you come from, planet loser?
Katerina - As opposed to planet "look at me, look at me".< hr width="60%"> Patrick - So what's your excuse?
Katarina - For?
Patrick - For acting the way we do?
Katarina - I don't like to do what people expect. Why should I live up to other people's expectations instead of my own?
Patrick - So, you disappoint them from the start and then you're covered, right?
Katarina - Something like that.
Patrick - Then you screwed up.
Katarina - How?
Patrick - You never disappointed me.
Bianca - Did you just maim joey's car?
Katarina - Yeah, looks like you're going to have to take the bus
Bianca - Has the fact that you're completely psycho managed to escape your attention?
(Kat just walks away)
Bianca - Daddy!
Mr. Stratford - Whoops? My insurance doesn't cover PMS!
Patrick - Who knocked up your sister?
Cameron - Oh, yeah, um, okay. I thought that we'd um, start with pronunciation, if that's alright with you.
Bianca - Not the hacking and gagging and spitting part, please.
Cameron - Well, uh, there is an alternative.
Bianca - There is?
Cameron - Yeah, French food. We could eat some together, uh, Saturday night?
Bianca - You're asking me out? That's so cute. What's your name again?
Cameron - Well, yeah, but I'm sure, you know, that there are lots of guys who wouldn't mind going out with a difficult woman. I mean, you know, people jump out of of airplanes and ski off cliffs. It'd be like "Extreme Dating."
Bianca - Huh? You think you could find someone that extreme?
Cameron - Yeah, sure. why not?
Bianca - And you'd do that for me?
Cameron - Hell, yes! I-I mean, you know, I could look into it.
Mr. Stratford - Hello Katarina, make anyone cry today?
Katarina - Sadly, no, but it's only 4:30.
Mr. Stratford - Where's your sister going?
Katarina - She's meeting some bikers, big ones, full of sperm.
Mr. Stratford - Funny. So tell me about this dance. Was it hoppin'?
Katarina - Parts of it.
Mr. Stratford - Which parts?
Katarina - The part where Bianca beat the hell out of some guy.
Mr. Stratford - Bianca did what?
Katarina - What's the matter, upset that I rubbed off on her?
Mr. Stratford - No, impressed.
Chastity - I know you can be overwhelmed and underwhelmed, but can you ever just be whelmed?