The reason I picked this particular study is because, it hit home. I was in her (Kate's) shoes, a while back. It was maybe 4 years ago. And everything that she has been though and all the excuses that were made were the same ones I made, they were very familiar to me. The case study relates to me as if I were telling you my story. And going though the pain all over again.
(1) Why a vibrant, intelligent and attractive young woman would allow herself to be trapped into a physical abusive relationship with a man who posed a real danger to her life. This question has been asked a lot to women in this kind of relationship. I really think that the women are emotionally incapable of walking away, some are confused with the difference between love and obsession. It was hard for me to see why I stayed in this relationship.
We have misguided beliefs that we can change the abusers behavior, or even fix it by loving them more, doing more, change ourselves to please that abuser, closing off friends and family, because he said that you need to give him more of you, because he needs you. You feel helpless and intermediate, that there is no way out, so we stay and put up with it. Trying your best to make things right and peaceful to please the abuser.
After a while the victim realizes that the relationship is not worth it and begins to take pride in themselves, and realize that violence is not a substitute for love. It took strong friends and family to make me, see that this was not a good or healthy relationship for me. Working and going to school full time was enough of a strain on me.