I'm driving along a deserted road, deserted and dusty,
In my four wheel drive, old and rusty,
All I see for miles on end
Is an infinite expanse of desert and sand.
My dog is panting with his head out of the window
And his tongue flapping around in the wind,
All I see in the horizon's eye,
A little town,
With my stomach a- rumble and my lips a-dry.
I drive slowly through the town,
No-one to be seen,
I feel I am alone and down.
I step into an old dirty bar,
Ten pairs of eyes follow me around,
As if I am an infamous criminal or an unwanted animal,
I take a seat and sigh with relief,
After my long exhausting journey beyond belief.
I order a beer and eye up the crowd,
I start my story but not too loud,
I tell them stories of adventures in the land
And soon I have them eating from the palm of my hand,
I show them photo's of the Australian coast,
I wager all they think I do is boast.
I cut to the chase and ask them a question,
''I've surfed all around the beaches of Australia and every ocean
And I'm getting a little bit bored!
The same old sand, the same old blue,
I'm wanting something new.''
They lift their eye brows and look around
They probably think I am a penny short of a pound.
I go on with my reason to appear,
''I hear the surfing is just fine around here,
So please can you tell me where the surf is to be found?''
They stare then laugh and then roll around,
And then one finally answers me,
''You must be stupid, you cannot see?
There's nothing but sand for ever...