The Book of Jeremiah and his Lamentations- the trouble with his bowels and other such Biblical nonsense, verse-by-verse.

Essay by Keir December 2005

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JEREMIAH

In this book Yahweh is in a bad mood throughout. He's constantly smiting and destroying anyone who irritates him and sends war, pestilence and famine to his own chosen people before scattering them. After a particularly lengthy tirade by the Amighty Jeremiah can take no more and cries out "My bowels! My bowels!".

i.10: This assertion by Yahweh didn't exactly happen, unless one considers the Palestinians today, but then they aren't exactly a 'kingdom'.

ii.20: Reference to Astarte.

ii.27: By ridiculing all those who say to a stone, Thou hast brought me forth, he has in mind Isaiah who advises his people to do just that! Which one then is the 'true' prophet?

ii.36: Yahweh asking Jeremiah why he's such a complainer.

iii.8: Going through all the necessary red-tape first, God gives his chosen people in the Kingdom of Judah a bill of divorce. If he was to do the same to a state like California, the people there would be entitled to half of what God has which would certainly solve their current financial crisis.

iii.16: The great mystery of the Bible: Whatever happened to the ark, the most powerful and important weapon it describes?

v.31: How do we know again which prophet does not prophesy falsely and who we are expected to believe? Does he have in mind Isaiah?

vi.10: Behold, their ear is uncircumcised. Is there anyone alive who has managed to circumcise his ear? Is it even possible?

vi.21: Is this a loving and merciful god?

vi.18: The queen of heaven mentioned here and later in the book, either refers to the Babylonian Ishtar, the Canaanite Anath or Astarte, or the Egyptian Isis.

vii.14: Jeremiah predicts the enemy's entry into the sanctuary where in Lam.i.10 it is forbidden.

vii.31: Reference to the use of human...