Computerz

Essay by EssaySwap ContributorHigh School, 12th grade February 2008

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My room is hot. I'm sweaty. My body sticks to the chair as i push my self harder and harder. Sweats pours down my chest.

Maybe I should let go, take a break. No, must go on. I look outside, staring, trying to take my mind off what I am doing.

It seems to last longer this way...

Why do I do this, why do I push my body like this. I should just go and get it done with. No, she pushes me back in, not letting me go.

This routine goes on for sometime...

She always seems to call out my name right before I let my body sleep. She pulls me back in, wanting more. She has no idea what I want. What I try to have.

The selfish bitch she is...

All she cares about is her. She wants me to play with her, take care of her, clean here, bring her gifts.

I want sleep, I want a new life.

Maybe I should get my sledge hammer...

That's all she needs, is a good hit right to the head. Let her brains splatter all over the place. Than I will show her who the boss is.

But no I love her...

It's built around the love/hate relationship. I love her. I would do anything for her. But yet I hate her.

Maybe I should caring her to the roof...

Place her on the end of the building. Tell her she can trust me, tell her I will show her the world. Than at the last second, send her over the edge.

Than in a split second, it would all be over. I could finally get away, do what I want. Not be tied down anymore. The addiction would be over, the drug no longer around to hurt me.

Than finally to the world I can let it be known, to all that can hear me. I would confess all my sins. Than finally scream to the world...

"I fucking hate my computer and I killed the bitch!" :-D