Essay by spoonman419High School, 10th grade July 2004

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About a month ago things were roling along pretty smoothly in the life of Dionysus. Family life was going aight, school was aight, friends were sweet and rugby had just started for the season. There were the usual worries of everyday life, but Dionysus felt in control of his life. We all love that feeling don't we; when we feel like everything's under control, it's great. Life though doesn't care much what we think, it just plods on regardless and soon enough Dionysus' pride led him to a fall.

He fell sick. Nothing overly tragic, but enough to remind him that there were forces beyond his control and that his life was far from his own. No more rugby, no more socializing, school suddenly loomed daunting and it all seemed about to crash down upon him.

It was while overwhelmed by the sudden loss of control and a feeling of impotence that Dionysus first encountered and experience he deemed to term "freaking out."

It's a complete loss of control, or more accurately an inability to deal with not being in control.

Dionysus' eating habits degenerated. He withdrew from the world, presenting a mask for his friends and parents while he fought an imaginary battle with in himself. He began to place blame. Subject to bad conscience he placed it on himself, subject to anger he placed it on others and subject to ignorance he placed it on God.

As Dionysus plunged himself into this battle that could not be won he grew angry. He became a cynic, spying faults in everything and everyone around him. He became bitter and what before had been a vague darkness on the horizon manifested itself as a very real cloud over Dionysus' world.

Crying himself to sleep and lost...