f you are reading this, you have already missed the opportunity to see me in my shorts. While my sporting a loincloth is rather exhilarating, I find Spam sandwiches mildly appetizing. Speaking of Spam, I've noticed an uncontrollable urge to yodel building from deep within me. Yodel! Yes"æyodel! Yodel, I say! Would the phrase "red Chinese car"àbe a double entendre? Oh, and what in the hell is Haiku. Up to this point there are no passive sentences on this page. Sometimes I lie awake at night and contemplate the nature of Man's insignificant place in the universe as a whole. Other times I just roll over and fart.
"æAnd"ænow"æfor"æsomething"æcompletely"ædifferent"æ You may have noticed the rather frequent use of ellipses. Well, there is a very good reason for it, and I'll tell you about it in this paragraph. That last sentence reminded me of Ronald Reagan ("Well"æyes, but no."ÃÂ).
Official Portrait of President Ronald Reagan
Ronald Reagan in Dixon, Illinois.
Ronald Reagan wearing cowboy hat at Rancho del Cie...I think of Uncle Wilber Ray now and again. I used to laugh when he would go to town every Saturday night and spend all his money. But nobody laughed when he would come home with a whore. He really paid for it because she had hair on her back. She kept telling him that she was wearing a sweater. I tried to tell him the truth about his hair ravaged little whore, but something told me to keep my mouth shut. I think it was Uncle Wilber Ray when he said, "Hey"ækeep you mouth shut."àHe was completely enamored with her even though she was toothless. You wouldn't think 185 pounds of woman on a hot little 5'2'' body could be attractive in that grotesque troll sort of way. She was gorgeous! Different...but gorgeous. So now that I have fully explained the rather frequent use of the ellipses in the previous paragraph, you should be more enlightened.
Spam! SPAM! Spam! SPAM! Spam! SPAM! Spam! SPAM! Sp...
Spam microcopy
Official Portrait of President Ronald Reagan.