Essay by PaperNerd ContributorCollege, Undergraduate October 2001

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Love I really enjoyed this course. There were a lot of enlightening and informative theories and aspects. But, one of the most beneficial to me was learning that people have different love languages. Marriage can be strengthened with understanding and God's principle's. Couples can learn to communicate with interpretation of a mate's love language, which is an essential element for its survival. God provided rules that must be followed to solidify unity between couples. With the aid of Dr. Gary Chapman and Elizabeth Achtemeier, harmony can be reestablished in marriages that are confusing, broken or have lost that sparkle that originally attracted both mates to each other.

People can confuse an "in love"� experience with what is real love as defined through this course. According to Dr. Chapman, the actual "in love"� experience lasts about two years. It is biological. The feeling of increased heart beat or blindness to another's imperfections wears out after the europhia of "in love"� has gone.

Dr. Chapman gives us five languages to aid us in our search for peace. The first is Words of Affirmation. With this technique, if positive feedback results from complimenting your spouse, then gentle kind words stimulate her. Requests should be done with praise and not in a condemning or in an "ordering"� tone of voice. It is proven that words of kindness produce results. The second is Quality Time. When a spouse requests attention in forms of going to movies, long drives or talking, what the spouse wants is your focused attention. It deals with listening, talking or just being present. It is participating in a nurturing experience. The third is Receiving Gifts. The spouse can be complimented not with value but thought. For example, a man courted his wife with flowers. After marriage the act of giving disappeared.