One disagreement could end with either me on my back crying or me on the floor with tears in my eyes. It was always a lose lose type of situation when it came to him and me. He did every and anything to make and keep me feeling powerless. He wanted to be dominant, honestly he was. I was so afraid of him. I always wanted to stay on his good side like a child did when it came to their parents. I tried my best to do everything he said in all the ways he wanted it done. When he said "get on your back" I automatically did. I pulled my pants off and layed on my back. Most of the time I didn't want to have sex. I just did it to avoid getting punched or slapped.
One day I did say no. He pushed me on the bed and basically ignored me.
He yelled at me and told me to do what he said but I didn't want to. I was tired of being such a punk and so defenseless, I needed to stand up for myself; that's exactly what I did. It didn't go as planned though. He punched me so hard I fell to the floor; he just hit me over and over again. In a way I felt numb, he punched in the same spots over and over. Tears rolled down my eyes and I just layed like a dead person. I felt lifeless. He finally stopped when he saw my face bleeding. I had a bloody nose and my body hurt like hell. I got up and told him I was done; I was tired of being so afraid. I wasn't born to be a punching bag so why was I living...