Mind Crisis

Essay by PaperNerd ContributorCollege, Undergraduate April 2001

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BALKAN TITANIC "I'm realy sick of your ideas, just let me sleep, OK? Don't you know I have school tommorow"¦ Will you finally give me a breake. I have only few hours to sleep"¦" And then, I usually give up, my thoughts are stronger than my will"¦ Again, I picture my country. I'm an average man, burried with obligations and problems. And that again is nothing unusual for an average Bosnian male. I'm walking towards my friend's coffee bar, I'll just stop for a drink or two, although I can still feel hungover. Where was I last night"¦ yes, we were at the party"¦ I remember still what one friend of mine told me what should I do when I'm drunk. He's already expert with things like that. he said that I should take a cup of anaestethic, it helped him once when he was in police station arrested for alcohol.

A weird man he is indeed. As all of us at one point. He also gave me a little bottle of that anaestethic, (prpbably he felt responsible for bringing mt to the party last night). Our local partyies are totally different than yours"¦ a little group of people in one room, sitting around a low rounded table. On the table you can see cheese, meet, vine, beer, ashtrays, and other things.. We don'tt dance, but we listen to music, or we sing"¦ sometimes we hug each other, then we laugh or cry, it depends on whether we are drunk already. The loudest ones are those which don't have any sence fof music. Faces are shining, some because of tears, some because of sweat or fat. Last night I took just a few beers, but I felt terrible this morrning anyway. Maybe it's because of bad air. Everything here exists for a reason. The streets are very dirty. In the center of town, shop-girls after they finish cleaning, usually spill stain water right in front of the shop. And while walking, you can see people around spitting on the street"¦ disqusting. That's why I'm walking less every day.

And then when I go to my office, I park my car as near as possible and than just jump into the buildng. People even sell chestnus unpeeled, and throw junk and seeds on the srteets. I hate that, because then they get into the sole of my shoes, very expencive shoes. Maybe it's ok for them, because they shoes are not $200. Yeah, I bought one more pair. Tenth pair since I arrived here. Well, sometimes I just have to use the advantages of shopping in a province like this. For instance. Mark from Personal spents third of his salary buying ties. Virginia (She and I are best friends) has ten pounds of silk clothing. That's just the first stage when you get back and start working a real job.

The other stage is writing a book. You really don't have to know a lot about this country. Just make a good title. And of course,you have to spend some time here. That gives "weight" to your book. I know several people, who use to spent all day in cars and coffee bars, or in office playing computer games, and next thing you hear is that one of them published a book. I have some ideas for my book. Like "Balkan Titanic" or "Bloody basement of Europe" and "European sewage system "" Bosnia", I think I'll include the word "bloody", it attracts people's attention.

I had to stop. The boss was here. He came to ask me where I got the shoes. That's just an excuse. He came to see if Adnan was back. Adnan took his dogs to haircut this morning, because the bosses driver had to take Johane (boss's doughter) to the airport.

I talked about her with the boss recently. He's going to give her a job in the Foreign Relations sector. Easy job, good money, and Johane's experience from "Avories Pub" is just enough at this moment. And job would be just to give announcements to the local journalists, and to read what we already wrote for her. It's not important is if the answer is relayed with a question. It's important that it's an answer and it doesn't metter if same word is repeated more times. We usually choose one word that is going to be repeated several times. Last week it was "corruption". It's not neccesary to know English, because journalists that are coming already know several languages. Smart people. Then again there are politicians,but they have their own translators.

What's that noise in the hallway all about? The boss is screaming again. I hope that Adnan took the right dog to the haircutter. Oh, it's his daughter, she has forgotten to bring a passport. She's at the airport, waiting"¦ we'll have just to send someone in the bosses jeep, that one was only available at this moment, wich means will have to cancel visit to refugie camp, planed for two hours. Well, the refugies won't go anywhere, that's for sure and if it snows latter"¦ well, the pictures will be more effective"¦ HEY, HEY"¦ wake up"¦Amir"¦Semir"¦. time for school guys"¦ Ahh, d- Monday