In a time long ago when bell bottoms swung freely across the top of shoes...I was loved.
No price to pay, no strings attached, no care in the world; rich in all the things that really mattered plus knowing I was daddy's little girl.
Oops Oops not my biological daddy but the only one that ever truly loved me. Daddy was in all my memories of happiness, daddy was always there.
Where was momma or did she dare to care. Snatching me away from everything and everyone I ever loved. Going places where hurt was around every corner and love could not flourish.
Not even the bottle of pills could kill the pain and hurt that had dwelled up within me and oozed out of every pore.
Dissapointed by momma, sometimes even now. Trying hard to forgive her many wrongs but the hurts so thick I can't see how.
From one relationship to the next, trying to find love but only finding sex. trying to find that person who could tell me I deserveto be loved.
Thinking when will she stop, thinking when will this pain stop. I'm drowning fast, losing sight of myself.
Hating me, hating what and who I've become. Never loving them, never loving me.
Through the storms came the rainbows of four colors each beautiful bringing rays of sunshine in my life. Now leaving all the hurt and pain behind and searching for my sunshine.
Finding God, then finding myself. Searching hard, then finding that love I always knew I needed and now deserved. A love so pure, so strong, knowing it was God's pick all along.
letter by letter he mended my heart. Love, joy, security, selfesteem and spirituality filled where there once lived dark. All God's gift's to me. Now I...