Good work, short yet to the point. Extremely informative for the amount written. Usually I would say you need to elaborate on the diffrenent 'layers' of our atmosphere, but with equal, accurate content for each what you have written is an effectual tribute. Well done, it is truely rare to see such a short, well written peice. Thumbs up.
- 08/05/2004
- 10:23:56
- Score: 4 out of 4 people found this comment useful.
You're essay is short, yet gives a good summarized history of Cell phones. Perhaps a better title, such as 'A breif history of Cell Phones and their Role in contemporary society'. I say this as you mention the history etc. and then contemporary uses. Also, providing specific dates is always better than approximations. One last contructive critique... perhaps you should not end with 'Cell phones have created a status symbol among many people' as it infers that that is what your entire essay was centered on, when it is actually 'Cell phones in today's society', not specifically their 'status' among people. Closing sentance / paragraph should bring closure as well as contain a summary of your entire essay. Oh, and paragraphing might be an idea as well :) Good work!
- 02/05/2004
- 11:36:43
- Score: 4 out of 4 people found this comment useful.
You're essay, although short, is well written. I have some contrustive criticism to offer, however. First of all, the focus appears to be on Woman in US politics. I feel you should elaborate more from your opening paragraph and not directly relate to books before explaining their context. I beleive you devoted to much writing to the particular Sandra Day O' Conner, what about those before her who didn't make it? Why exactly did she make it? etc. If you're going to write so much about her in such a short peice, you've got to make the essay longer including other woman, references to steps in the struggle to make it political office. Aside from this, it is a nice, short, effective essay. Good work.
- 01/05/2004
- 11:58:20
- Score: 7 out of 7 people found this comment useful.
If this is an essay, you made it a little to personal with the repeaded references to 'me' and 'my friend'. That's just my opinion, also, beggining of second paragraph 'Name-calling, pre-judgments, false assumptions of ethnic stereotyping are all examples of small-scaled problems in our society'. Much more than 'small-scaled' problems, I think at least. Also, you've chosen to discuss the topic of Steriotyping so when you make a statement like that, you sort of berate your 'thesis'. Aside from that, good work. Particlarly enjoyed the concluding paragraph.
- 28/04/2004
- 20:42:16
- Score: 3 out of 3 people found this comment useful.
Interesting and Educational essay, summarized well (not redundant). However, perhaps you should not reffer to 'Cruithne' as a Satellite... Satellites are specifically man-made. Also, the reference to the moon being a Satellite confused me. Just my two cents, aside from that, Good work.
- 26/04/2004
- 16:21:42
- Score: 6 out of 6 people found this comment useful.
Excellent work, good comparison(s)and perspective of sex/gender, and the effects our society has on them in contemporary society.
- 25/04/2004
- 09:18:29
- Score: 6 out of 6 people found this comment useful.