User Details For: PandorianRose

Essay List

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Comments List
  • Agree

    I agree with everyone else. I never saw Harry Potter on that level. Thanks for the wonderful insight.
    • 24/03/2004
    • 21:00:07
    • Score: 9 out of 9 people found this comment useful.
  • Comment

    Your intro doesn't open the paper up very well. There wasn't much of a thesis statement, and I thought that the "...I will look at in the essay" was a bit abrupt.Your conclusion leaves the reader trying to decide what your final answer is. You say yes you agree with the statement, but then you contradict yourself. In the body of the paper you do that as well.Make sure to pick one answer and stick with it. The reader gets lost in translation if you switch sides or ride the fence post on an answer.
    • 24/03/2004
    • 01:46:49
    • Score: 0 out of 0 people found this comment useful.
  • Comment

    There were lots of typos and several sentences that ran on, missed and wrong placed punctuation and unequal flow of thought. The heart of the paper is good, but it's a little rough around the edges.Several of your sentences included two different messages. You could have split these into two parts and elaborated on each, making for a better flowing paper.
    • 24/03/2004
    • 01:33:15
    • Score: 5 out of 5 people found this comment useful.
  • A few typos

    First of all I just want to say that I enjoyed the perspective you gave of Shylock. I just wanted to point out one or two typos that I saw. In paragraph 4 you have "it" when I think it should read "is". Also, you might try substituting a different word periodically in place of "technicality". It just seems that the word was used too much in that paragraph. Good job on this essay though.
    • 24/03/2004
    • 01:22:12
    • Score: 0 out of 0 people found this comment useful.