1 - This was so incredibly cliched. I seriously expected your vampire to laugh and say "I vant to suck your blood!" One of the most important things about writing is either avoiding cliches all together or only using them if you know how to make them seem new.2 - Is English your first language? If so, you have no excuse to make such basic grammatical mistakes.3 - I think you should learn how to integrete adjectives into a story - it adds richness to your writing.Not trying to flame, just giving my honest opinion.
- 14/07/2005
- 03:58:54
- Score: 3 out of 4 people found this comment useful.
I think you've simplified the issue very well and if that was your aim then congratulations but every point you made left me wanting more. Also, why didn't you write a conclusion? It would have given your essay the structure it was lacking.
- 14/07/2005
- 03:44:18
- Score: 2 out of 2 people found this comment useful.
whoops, i made a few typos in my comment sorry :|but i do have one other thing to refute: what is this research that *proves* it\'s murder? a fetus up until the third trimester is not a viable human being. this is irrefutable fact.
- 30/05/2005
- 01:32:14
- Score: 1 out of 2 people found this comment useful.
you actually submitted this as an essay? at a 4th year university level and got 97%? riiight, what uni's thing, the university of crappy rhetoric and bad writing?this lacks structure and actual information. sure, you may think abortion is murder and everyone who has one eats babies or whatever. but you've failed to back it up beyond "OMG ABORTION IS SO EVIL!!! I SUCK!!!!".my tip: learn what a research essay actually is.also either learn to use the english language or submit essays in your native tongue.
- 30/05/2005
- 01:28:22
- Score: 3 out of 5 people found this comment useful.