This essay has some serious problems, both logically, and syntacticly. Although the ideas behind the essay are firm, it is very hard to read due to the formatting (an easy fix), and the extreme punctuation problems. It appears that you just threw in periods and commas wherever it seemed there needed to be a pause, with no regard for where a sentence ends, and the next one begins. All in all, a bad essay. Sorry.
- 09/09/2009
- 23:14:52
- Score: 0 out of 0 people found this comment useful.
I agree completely with the ideas expressed in the essay; however, it is not terribly well written.For example, the word choice is very elementary, and repetitive. The word most is overused in the first paragraph: "...most people have a different view and most children with disabilities are placed with typical children of the same age. Even though most children with disabilities are part of most regular activities at school..."The first sentence of the second paragraph, as another example, could be written to be clearer and more concise.
- 06/09/2009
- 20:58:40
- Score: 0 out of 0 people found this comment useful.
This essay is definitely one that I would consider an A/A+.There are some problems with choppiness, especially near the end, but all-in-all, a superb essay.
- 06/09/2009
- 20:53:32
- Score: 1 out of 1 people found this comment useful.
It is easy to see the emotion in this piece. In that aspect, the writer excelled. However, the diction and syntax leave quite a bit of room for improvement. It could definitely stand to go through an edit or two.
- 06/09/2009
- 20:48:24
- Score: 0 out of 0 people found this comment useful.