You were robbed in your grading, I think you created a good argument on this concept where information is difficult to source. Every point you have made you have justified, but I do think this could have been an excellent topic to raise and strong argument or discussion. Well done.
- 31/03/2005
- 11:41:00
- Score: 0 out of 0 people found this comment useful.
This essay is really good as it provides so much information and outlines such a large topic well. My only criticism would be with the conclusion as I think you missed a great opportunity to put some personality into the piece.
- 11/08/2004
- 00:42:49
- Score: 5 out of 5 people found this comment useful.
It's an interesting concept and within society is predominantly true. I liked the structure of your essay as it was easy to read, and set out strong, clear points within each paragraph. I thought your discussion of the Matrix could be developed, but overall a great piece. :)
- 03/08/2004
- 02:36:08
- Score: 2 out of 3 people found this comment useful.
A great story and even better writing style. I really enjoyed how you expressed yourself. Well done.
- 03/08/2004
- 02:06:53
- Score: 18 out of 20 people found this comment useful.
Wheather we like it or not we are to blame. We can not blame the media or the celebrities as they are just producing a product to best satisfy what we are demanding. Sex, violence and drugs will continue to be displayed as long as we're all looking. I think the biggest tragedy is the children who take in all these images and ideas. The average Australia 12 year old has already seen 500,000 ads and look at Barbie, hardly a realistic representation.
- 03/08/2004
- 01:47:35
- Score: 5 out of 6 people found this comment useful.
First and foremost I enjoyed the level of clarity within this piece, as many times with complex poetry it is easy to lose direction when analysing. Secondly I thought it was an appropriate structure as it was concise, commenting on the issues raised without becoming boring. Lastly I like the way that you saved your main discussion of the issue till the end, this was effective. I always seem to get impatient when analysing poetry and have a scatered discussion throughout the piece, but it has more impact at the end. Excellent Job. :)
- 02/08/2004
- 03:21:43
- Score: 37 out of 41 people found this comment useful.
A very interesting interpretation of a timeless tale. I always enjoy, especially with Shakespears works, seeing the story conveyed from an alternate perspective. I think Friar provides guidance and did precipitate the events that follow, but I feel the only characters that should be held accountable are the heads of the two opposing families as their hate is the force that creates the barriers between the star cross'd lovers. But a creative and strong arguement. :)
- 02/08/2004
- 02:20:10
- Score: 17 out of 18 people found this comment useful.
I think this is beautifully written it has excellent structure, a strong analysis of the play and reflective comments on the meaning. I really think this covers all the major aspects of the play, well done.
- 01/08/2004
- 02:56:38
- Score: 57 out of 59 people found this comment useful.
Try not to be so breif on so many aspects of the one topic. Rather focus on an specific piece and provide a greater depth into a smaller portion :)
- 05/09/2003
- 04:13:30
- Score: 4 out of 5 people found this comment useful.