May 27, 2005 was one of the worst days of my life. Actually, the day didn't start out terrible it was actually a good day. I was in 3rd grade and school was quite fun and exciting back then. Normally, one of my older brothers Jhaliyl or Khaliyl would pick me up from school every day, but this day my whole family picked me up. My first thought was something must be wrong, but immediately excitement took over and I was ready to go have fun with my family. When we got home my father sat us down and told me my older cousin, my favorite cousin and my role model was killed in a car accident. The feeling I felt was inexplicable it was like my heart stopped for a moment. All the breath I ever had was knocked out of me; I couldn't breathe, and part of me didn't want to breathe.
I was truly lost.
Over the next week or so my family and I went through the motions. With time I began to slowly come around, but something just was not right I wasn't the same. I was confused I didn't understand why God had to take her from me. I questioned my parents and they just kept telling me everything will be alright, them saying with time I will feel better like a cliché that didn't work but was all they had. Ultimately my question was just, "Why God?" Growing up in church I was always taught God has a plan and reason for everything he does, but for the life of me I couldn't figure out the plan or reason behind taking the life of someone I loved so much. While knowing there is a better place and my cousin was there...