Family System

Essay by pantherskateHigh School, 10th gradeA+, April 2006

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Everyones familys are unique. Either they are full of trouble, full of siblings, or small. But no madder how big, or small your family is, or how many differences everyones famailys have, there is one thing each of our familys have in common. Familys are complex, its made into a system of roles played by each sibling and family member. One or more people can play one or more roles in the family.

For example, its starts with the father and mother, or the addict and the enabler. The addict, usually the father, is addictided to a substance. Lets say this dad is an alcoholic. dad isn't happy unless he has his daily 6 pack of beers. Next is the enabler. Usually the mother, the enabler feels loved and needed in life by the dependandt alcoholic dad. When ever the dad is upset the mother feels appreciated by the dad when she gives him a drink that satisys him.

It turns into a vicouse cycle of dad needing mom to provide drinks for him and mom needing dad to make her feel wike she has a place in life.

Then they have a child. They have their expectations set high for their first born. The first born is the hero. The hero gets good grades, has lots of friends, and never gets into trouble. The hero gets all the positive attention. The hero is usually the successful one in the family who has a wealthy, easy life. Setting the standards high for the next baby for positive attetion, the hero is the most liked.

When the next sibling comes along the attention is mostly on the hero. The second sibling is the scapegoat. Since the expectations to get positive attention was set so high by hero, the scapegoat has to resort to the easier attention to get. The scapegoat gets the negative attention. All the trouble in school, trouble with the law, low grades, drugs, and trouble with the family are all caused by the scapegoat. The scapegoat is usually the member in the family who ends up in jail and looses contact with the family.

There is another child born. The mascot. The mascot sees that there is so much trouble and stress spreading around in the family that he sets his focus to laughing away the troubles. For every day and occasion this is the sibling that makes all the jokes an is usually the most liked next to the hero. The mascot usually ends up with a normal lived life with normal succsess. Most of the comedians are commonly the mascots of their familys.

Last of all there is one more baby. This last one is called the lost child. The lost child sees that all the roles are taken, and that there is to much drama and stress choking the house that the lost child abandons the group. He doesn't want anything to do with such a curropt family. Most of the family members forget about the lost child. The lost child has a life outside of the home with other people. the lost child is the one of the siblings to first leave the household. He is the one not thought of when organizing a family get together.

Most familys consist of either all or just a few or these roles. Not all roles are this intense. But the typical family consists of this family system.