Through The Woods

Essay by PaperNerd ContributorCollege, Undergraduate August 2001

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It was Thursday and I was enjoying my day off when it had occurred to me that I did not do my English project. I grabbed my mom's digital camera and hopped in my car to drive to one of the forest preserves. By the time I had arrived dusk was on my heels. I got out and did a quick survey of the land to know where to go and what to expect on my next journey here. I did not start heading back to my car until the sun had completely set. I felt I was being more observed by the animals than observing them. I saw quite a few deer and other smaller animals on the way back to my car. But alas, it was too dark for the pictures to come out. When I got back to my car I slowly drove out of the preserve to not hit something which would have jumped in front of me.

Right upon the exits beginning a pack of three deer jumped out in front of me. I thought I would get a good photo. The three deer were in a picture perfect pose, the smaller fawn standing in front with the doe and the buck behind it the doe to the left and the buck to the right. They stood there as if they were waiting for me to take a photo of them. By the time I had gotten the camera to start up into ready-to-take-picture mode the pack of three deer had run off across the plane and over a hill out of site. I sighed and hopped for a better picture later.

It was Friday and school had just ended. I sped to my car from my computer science class. I then went to the very same forest preserve I had been in the previous day. I decided to go on one of the walking paths which were at the end of the driving path. It was fairly deep into the woods. I was walking rather quiet to not frighten any animals off. I noticed it was too quiet, eerily quiet. Not a bird chirping. Just the deafening of the silent stagnant air is what I heard. After a great while and many thorns that go into my jeans later I decided to head back. On my way back I didn't encounter any deer which wanted me to take a picture of them.

I have awakened out of my dream. The red glow of my clock was staring me in the face. It was screaming 12:34 in bold digital numbers. I got out of bed, stretched, and did my daily routine. I felt the strongest sense of déjà vu as I got into my car again to drive to where I could connect with nature. Walking for hours I couldn't find any animals. I probably have scared them off with my make shift canteen, simply a two litter bottle of soda that had been filled with water. Once it had begun to get dark again I walked back to my car tired and hungry. Not more than a football field's length there was a pack of twelve or so deer. Knowing it was too dark for a picture from that distance I had to move in. Not being like a city boy, I walked in with cunning stealth, slowly and against the wind. I knew that if I were to go with the wind the air would carry my scent and reveal my proximal location and send them scattering. It felt like an eternity making a half circle to compensate for the winds direction so I could walk towards the deer with the wind against me. At about twenty yards I foolishly gave away my location by stepping on a twig. It made a rather loud cracking noise and sent them running. I repressed a scream with a feeling so great that no single word could describe its magnitude. This feeling was like a bright sun, only radiating darkness from its core. On the mere edges of its length a million miles away could you call it rage, animosity, hatred, etc. Deep with in the core of this dark pulsating force is what I felt. I didn't want to let it out for every soul for a thousand miles would have felt a cold shiver down their spine. My sun and moon signs being Scorpio (Not too common) I would tend to be more of the stereo-typical Scorpio. It takes me a lot to get angry and I forget about it rather quickly. This was on the border line of pushing me over.

Awaking with a grunt I was not happy. I knew it was Sunday and my last shot at getting this assignment done. I started to get out of bed when my body ached. I have pushed myself and was paying for the consequences. In reality it wasn't that much. Just walking around, but on a scale of someone who sits in front of their computers all day or plays their guitars it was very exerting work. After cleaning myself I limped to my car. It was sometime after noon and sometimes before sunset. I hoped I had a lot of time to finish this. Having a very bad sense of time I didn't know it was "˜a lot'. I stretched for a few minutes as I got out of the car before I was going to venture on to connect with nature. It felt colder than usual, maybe because I didn't bring a 2nd shirt, perhaps it was because my coat's zipper was broken, or even it might just have been colder outside. I ventured on through the woods. I went on yet another path. This had a river. I knew that a little river wouldn't have stopped me. What reinforced my will to go over the river were deer tracks going in that direction. I didn't want to get my feet wet so I looked for a fallen tree. Luckily I found one. It looked very old. Hoping it would sustain my weight I crossed it. Just as I thought, "Hey! I'm actually going to make it!" the fallen tree broke and my foot slipped into the water. Nearly falling over I recovered my balance, only to continue on with a soggy shoe. My foot might have been saved if my shoes weren't so ghetto and filled with various holes, but I'm too cheap for new shoes. If the sole is attached to the bottom, even if it was held on by duct tape, it was good enough for me. I regretted that thinking when I had to finish this assignment with my soaked foot. I decided to head back after I had seen the third sign to head back. The first was a rather strong breeze in the opposite direction I was heading in. The second was what looked like an arrow pointing in the opposite direction from which I came. It wasn't a man made arrow in the dirt. It seemed to be from a fallen tree and other broken branches. The final was a dead end. Regretting I didn't go back at the first sign, I walked back to my car. By the time I had got there it was dark again. Disappointed I didn't connect with nature on this assignment I started writing the paper portion. Although I am not completely disappointed, I have connected with nature more than once on different occasions. Most of them if not all were through meditation and astral projection. Not surprisingly either. Most witches use these as a preferred preference. The best place for me to find myself and my "˜in-tune-ness' with nature is in my very own closet in my meditation area right in front of my Alter.

In conclusion I'd like to state that although I enjoyed getting out into nature because I do not go outside much. I didn't like that I had to find a decent photograph to go along with the experience of connecting with nature which didn't happen for me in this assignment. I did, however, enjoy the fact that I now know these woods a bit more and can find a secluded spot and meditate there to my hearts content. I'm not sure I'll be doing that often in the winter, perhaps on Yule or an Esbat. Even though this assignment had its disadvantages I feel the advantages out weighted them.