Your introductory paragraph didn't explain much at all. You're also missing a thesis statement.
- 29/04/2002
- 19:02:58
- Score: 5 out of 5 people found this comment useful.
This essay is too short. Your essay has too much quotations, and less ideas. You need to write more about what you think, and about the thesis statement.
- 29/04/2002
- 18:57:32
- Score: 6 out of 6 people found this comment useful.
Your thesis needs to be more powerful, and you seem to be addressing different ideas. Your essay needs to be focused on an idea. You also made some spelling mistakes.
- 11/04/2002
- 21:10:31
- Score: 34 out of 34 people found this comment useful.