I like it, how you're sort of copying Dickens by using extra-long sentences, very interesting.
- 07/01/2006
- 13:09:33
- Score: 2 out of 2 people found this comment useful.
I'd say it's too short. And you only give a simply summarization of Stalin's reign - no opinion of your own.But it's good otherwise.
- 17/10/2004
- 15:56:32
- Score: 3 out of 5 people found this comment useful.
1) Where'd you get all the facts? Cite sources.2) Make the facts more definitive. You say "About 10,800 of unborn children are dead for the reason of air pollution existence". 10,800 die each year? Have died since they began counting? What? Explain.
- 17/05/2004
- 22:23:40
- Score: 4 out of 4 people found this comment useful.
How could I call this. Remix? Rip-off?It would be good if it was alone, if the real song (which, by the way, I don't like) didn't exist. But if something extremely similar to this exists already, I can't help it but disapprove of it.
- 17/05/2004
- 22:10:24
- Score: 4 out of 15 people found this comment useful.
Good essay, but the sentences are a bit too short. Try using compound and complex sentences - they ease the flow of the text.
- 17/05/2004
- 22:02:01
- Score: 20 out of 20 people found this comment useful.
I like it; topic is good, supporting details, etc.One thing I don't like - some of the sentences. I'm extremely picky about them; sentences such as "Even in ancient times where the population would never fall below sixty million (Hsu 1)". Fragments!
- 17/05/2004
- 22:00:23
- Score: 23 out of 24 people found this comment useful.
Your ideas are only slightly organized, I think. It looks as though you just blurted out all the ideas you had and wrote them down, with no editing afterwards.
- 16/05/2004
- 21:56:23
- Score: 2 out of 3 people found this comment useful.
Your sentences are in fragments/run-ons. That is a bit annoying at times.Also, I fail to see any relationship between the two time periods. I mean... yeah, there were some similarities, but why exactly those?:)
- 28/03/2004
- 18:35:54
- Score: 0 out of 0 people found this comment useful.