User Details For: rosebikini

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  • Paragraphing

    yo don't forget to break up your ideas into paragraphseg. The visuals were also awesome.(introducin idea) then examples the:n Those were the things that made the movie good, not the story. after which you left a space that was good and well strustured but u left it in the same paragraph as your comments about the new characters =) otherwise awesome work an i defnitly dont think ill bother with the Harry Potter movie!
    • 11/06/2004
    • 22:51:42
    • Score: 3 out of 3 people found this comment useful.

  • Linking

    Hey that was good for a 9th grade essay. but to improve it try linking the ideas of his history to themes and motifs in his books
    • 11/06/2004
    • 22:40:46
    • Score: 2 out of 2 people found this comment useful.