User Details For: aliaqa

Essay List
Comments List
  • Too many quotes

    Your essay is very nicely written, and well thought out. Generally people say that there is no such thing as too many quotes, but at a certain point they become too many. You use quite a few quotes, some of which you could do without. The main problem with your quotes is that you use too many in one paragraph or in close proximity to each other. Overall, your essay is well thought out and interesting.
    • 13/06/2002
    • 18:55:43
    • Score: 9 out of 10 people found this comment useful.
  • Not well developed...

    You have a good topic here, but you've failed to develop it enough. Another problem is that you repeat many of the things you say. Try revising the thesis, so as to give your essay a more meaningful perspective. You say that you had many good conversations on this, if so, then it would make your essay stronger if you were to mention what was said in these conversations. Perhaps use a few quotes?
    • 11/06/2002
    • 17:40:40
    • Score: 11 out of 11 people found this comment useful.
  • Essay or answer to a prompt?

    Is this supposed to be an essay or an answer to a prompt? The thesis is vague, unclear and not defined. The 'essay' does not address the prompt either.
    • 10/06/2002
    • 01:10:40
    • Score: 4 out of 4 people found this comment useful.
  • Too much description of the plot

    This is a well-written essay, but i think it has some short comings. It doesn't seem to address the topic, of comparing Nick and Gatsby, but is rather a summarization of the plot. It would be better if it compared the location of the two characters in the story, both in relation to Daisy and their physical location in West Egg.
    • 10/06/2002
    • 01:00:48
    • Score: 4 out of 4 people found this comment useful.