User Details For: Shortmofia11

Essay List
Comments List
  • Conclusion

    A two sentence conclusion? You need to be more descriptibe in your conclusion without going overboard. Also add more of your own words rather than a body par full of quotes
    • 02/02/2004
    • 17:30:36
    • Score: 2 out of 2 people found this comment useful.
  • Ok

    I myself have submited a Gates essay to this site. This essay does not provide a sufficent biography but it has all the basic facts of his life. You should have analyzed all of his charities because that is a crucial part of his life.
    • 09/08/2003
    • 15:49:02
    • Score: 5 out of 5 people found this comment useful.
  • A little Odd

    If it is an extreme incident that causes pregnancy there still cannot be an exception. The law either favors abortion or it does not, there are no exceptions (Note:I dont believe in abortion). I also feel there is a little bit to much opinion involved in the essay but most of the opinions and ideas are backed up with hard facts. I felt another odd idea was "that the mother is also killing every other person that would have been in the baby's family tree." Even if the child is born it does not mean the child will reproduce.
    • 01/08/2003
    • 16:51:17
    • Score: 12 out of 13 people found this comment useful.
  • Very Good

    This essay is excellent and it is written just as well as any text book. All of the facts are backed up with either statistics or evidence from our history. The only change I would have made is not using first person naritive in the opening paragraph.
    • 01/08/2003
    • 16:42:54
    • Score: 2 out of 3 people found this comment useful.
  • Obvious Health Hazards

    We all know how smoking effects the body by now and at this point most of the data in the essay is familiar to myself. Although the vocabulary was very good I could recieve the same information by just watching a "Truth" commercial.
    • 29/07/2003
    • 06:41:34
    • Score: 3 out of 3 people found this comment useful.