A Daisy imagines a University Garden, by Sarhad
A daisy was imagining such a university where it wouldn't find itself this much beautiful in anywhere else. A garden, where it would feel any moment of its life pleasant, point at all its amusing and emotional minutes, and miss its multicoloured image every time.
The daisy was wishing such a garden of a university, be an enlightening garden, full of various people who add colour and shoot out their branches around the university walls. The daisy was thinking a garden where various flowers took their splendour from their deep roots.
The daisy was wishing a university be a nest of education that rebels against harmful grasses, against its dark memoirs, its sad past, against the treachery and the larva inside itself. The daisy was wishing the university cry out "there is life in here " like a hut in the fairy tales by its reflecting light from its window in a pitch-dark, â¦but if the daisy wouldn't consider the untouched cleanliness of the garbage boxes in the garden as if they are new manufactured and also if the daisy wouldn't consider the similarity of its garden to an open garbage box in such a place where all flowers strike their roots, share their loves, share their beauties, and share their hearts one to another.
Think that as if all students are the flowers of this garden! I am the daisy, you are the violet and she is the rose.
The scattered garbage between us has passed over our length, the harmful grasses have weakened our roots and they have put the sunlight which comes from the windows of the university, in their shade above us. And you the violet boy! or you the rose girl! How would you realize...
A Very Queer Daisy....Excellently Written
I would just like to confer these points briefly: The writing wasn't coherently arranged. It wasn't paraphrased correctly...There were numerous grammatical errors, notably, repetition and redundancy.
However, there were some positives;
It had excellent manipulation of the English language as well as using diction , language techniques and strategies, such as metaphors and similes...The most important figurative device was the personification, the writer personifies the daisy, for it to dream, this was very well done.
Modes of discourse include; exposition and description...there is also narration...but description and exposition is the more predominant...description being the primary mode of discourse....
Overall the writing was very well done...However, with respect to the score received, it should have been a bit higher...I would give it a 75%...
That daisy sure is smart!!!
If you look closely, the writer has brought in some issues...But it's up to your interpretation...
Sarhad, I must commend you for this story...
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