User Details For: Daimos

Essay List
Comments List
  • Format

    The essay is good, but you need to format it. Intro, body, conclusion should be easy to locate.Your essay right now is just a big block of words making it very hard to read.
    • 21/01/2007
    • 10:44:24
    • Score: 3 out of 3 people found this comment useful.
  • Work on conclusion

    More work on conclusion needed, but otherwise very good essay.
    • 23/11/2006
    • 08:50:44
    • Score: 0 out of 0 people found this comment useful.
  • More work

    Very weak intro and conclusion, though the body is solid.
    • 23/11/2006
    • 08:49:10
    • Score: 0 out of 0 people found this comment useful.
  • Conlcusion

    You need a stronger, more cohesive conclusion than just listing the results.
    • 23/11/2006
    • 08:48:33
    • Score: 1 out of 1 people found this comment useful.
  • Format

    Pretty solid, but you need to format it so it'll be easier to read.
    • 23/11/2006
    • 08:47:37
    • Score: 1 out of 4 people found this comment useful.
  • Conclusion?

    Starts off strong, but weak conclusion kind of ruins it.
    • 18/11/2006
    • 11:44:31
    • Score: 0 out of 0 people found this comment useful.
  • Transitioning

    Overall the essay was good, probably not the best you can do but it was good, however one thing that noticed was the slight lack of smoothness in transitioning from one paragraph to another.
    • 18/11/2006
    • 11:42:37
    • Score: 0 out of 0 people found this comment useful.
  • Good Work

    Your essay is very well done, though you should find smoother way of transition into your conclusion than, "In conclusion".
    • 18/11/2006
    • 11:38:51
    • Score: 0 out of 0 people found this comment useful.
  • Nice Work

    Overall your essay was done quite well, though you should find a smoother way of transition into your conclusion.
    • 18/11/2006
    • 11:37:27
    • Score: 2 out of 2 people found this comment useful.
  • Work on intro

    You need to work on your intro, the first sentance doesn't go along to well with the rest of the intro.
    • 12/09/2006
    • 17:40:38
    • Score: 0 out of 0 people found this comment useful.
  • Short

    This essay seems a bit too short, it would be better if you were to expand a bit on some of your ideas.
    • 12/09/2006
    • 17:39:20
    • Score: 1 out of 1 people found this comment useful.
  • Confusing?

    Somewhat weak and confusing conclusion especially, "The only person who survived the Holocaust is Otto Frank." It makes it sound as if Otto Frank was the survivor of actual Holocaust instead Anne Frank's group.
    • 12/09/2006
    • 17:35:49
    • Score: 0 out of 0 people found this comment useful.
  • Stronger conclusion

    Very good, essay but it lacks a bit at the end your essay would be better if you improved your conclusion.
    • 12/09/2006
    • 17:32:44
    • Score: 0 out of 1 people found this comment useful.
  • Format

    While the information is good, you need to format your essay into at least three sections intro, body, and conclusion. Formatting your essay will allow the reader to retain the information better.
    • 12/09/2006
    • 17:31:39
    • Score: 0 out of 0 people found this comment useful.
  • Need more work on quotes

    Your use of quotes is good, but your explanations of them are too weak. You need to tie them to the essay better.
    • 04/06/2006
    • 14:10:47
    • Score: 1 out of 1 people found this comment useful.
  • Good but..

    A good essay, but it could be better if it had a more solid intro and conclusion.
    • 04/06/2006
    • 14:09:32
    • Score: 1 out of 1 people found this comment useful.
  • Good

    Good use of examples though you conclusion is a bit weak.
    • 04/06/2006
    • 14:08:20
    • Score: 0 out of 0 people found this comment useful.
  • Good

    Very solid, but try not to use "in conclusion"
    • 04/06/2006
    • 14:07:28
    • Score: 2 out of 2 people found this comment useful.
  • Weak Conclusion

    Very weak conclusion, you need to wrap everything from the essay up in the conclusion, not state something.
    • 01/06/2006
    • 18:47:30
    • Score: 0 out of 0 people found this comment useful.
  • Weak Intro and Concllusion

    Your essay is solid but your intro and conclusion is short and weak.
    • 01/06/2006
    • 18:46:10
    • Score: 3 out of 3 people found this comment useful.
  • Vague

    A little bit vague and scattered.
    • 01/06/2006
    • 18:45:10
    • Score: 0 out of 0 people found this comment useful.
  • Last sentance

    The last sentence needs some work, it needs to be either a part of the 5th paragraph or a whole speperate conclusion.
    • 01/06/2006
    • 18:44:08
    • Score: 1 out of 2 people found this comment useful.
  • Great Essay

    Awesome essay, but try not to use "in conclusion".
    • 01/06/2006
    • 18:42:00
    • Score: 0 out of 0 people found this comment useful.
  • Weak intro & concl

    Good body, but weak intro and conclusion, with some work it could be better.
    • 01/06/2006
    • 18:40:47
    • Score: 2 out of 5 people found this comment useful.
  • Good

    Your essay was solid till the end. You should elaborate more on that quote and provide a stronger conclusion.
    • 01/06/2006
    • 18:40:01
    • Score: 0 out of 0 people found this comment useful.
  • Weak intro and concl

    You have a good essay, but you lack a strong inro and a conclusion. Other than that, the name "Kate Chopin" is used to much in the intro, its become repetitive.
    • 31/05/2006
    • 12:38:11
    • Score: 0 out of 0 people found this comment useful.
  • Work on Conclusion

    Very good essay, but you need to work on a stronger conclusion.
    • 31/05/2006
    • 09:10:17
    • Score: 1 out of 2 people found this comment useful.
  • No Structure

    This may be creative writing but you should have at least some semblence of a structure.
    • 31/05/2006
    • 09:09:16
    • Score: 2 out of 2 people found this comment useful.
  • Good

    Good essay, but you could improve it by elaborating on some of the facts.
    • 31/05/2006
    • 09:07:57
    • Score: 0 out of 0 people found this comment useful.
  • Weak Conclusion

    Extremely weak conclusion. It really brings down the rest of your essay, which is good.
    • 30/05/2006
    • 18:53:50
    • Score: 1 out of 1 people found this comment useful.
  • Too short

    This "essay" is too short, with a quote like that there are a lot of things you could focus and write about.
    • 30/05/2006
    • 18:50:53
    • Score: 1 out of 1 people found this comment useful.
  • Needs work

    You need a better intro and conclusion, you have the right ideas but you need to expand on them.
    • 30/05/2006
    • 18:49:52
    • Score: 0 out of 0 people found this comment useful.
  • Good essay, lacks conclusion

    Very nice essay, but you need to work on the conclusion.
    • 30/05/2006
    • 18:46:21
    • Score: 1 out of 1 people found this comment useful.
  • Good

    It seems a bit too short for such a large topic as obesity but it is simple and straight to the point.
    • 30/05/2006
    • 18:43:15
    • Score: 0 out of 0 people found this comment useful.
  • Interesting

    Very interesting essay, I liked some of the theories you brought up.
    • 30/05/2006
    • 18:42:17
    • Score: 3 out of 3 people found this comment useful.
  • Intro: needs work

    Simple and efficient, but your intro needs more work.
    • 30/05/2006
    • 18:41:15
    • Score: 3 out of 4 people found this comment useful.
  • Work on conclusion

    Good essay, but you need to work on your conclusion.
    • 29/05/2006
    • 20:46:28
    • Score: 1 out of 1 people found this comment useful.
  • Weak Conclusion

    You need a stronger conclusion to wrap things up, otherwise its a decent essay.
    • 29/05/2006
    • 14:26:08
    • Score: 0 out of 0 people found this comment useful.
  • Decent but

    Seems a bit short, you should elaborate on some of the aspects of the article, especially pertaining to the literary devices.
    • 29/05/2006
    • 14:25:05
    • Score: 0 out of 0 people found this comment useful.
  • Essay?

    This isn't an essay, instead all you've wrote are questions.
    • 29/05/2006
    • 14:23:40
    • Score: 0 out of 0 people found this comment useful.
  • Weak conclusion

    Most of the essay is good, but your conclusion is weak.
    • 29/05/2006
    • 14:21:44
    • Score: 0 out of 0 people found this comment useful.
  • Needs structure

    Good essay, but you need to format or at least have it structured.
    • 24/05/2006
    • 19:06:07
    • Score: 0 out of 0 people found this comment useful.
  • Nice

    Your essay is nice but the fact that you didn't format it, detracted from the essay. I found it a bit distracting to read. But overall a very good essay.
    • 08/05/2006
    • 18:07:25
    • Score: 0 out of 0 people found this comment useful.
  • Proper Title?

    While the essay is good, you need a proper title "life Cycle", just doesn't cut it. The title should tell about what you're writing about.
    • 05/12/2005
    • 22:46:51
    • Score: 0 out of 1 people found this comment useful.
  • Elaborate.

    The topic of whether scence is good or evil is quite broad, first of all when you're talking about whether it is good or evil use a real life event instead of a movie. And if you are going to use the movie in your essay at least change the title so that it fits more to what you're writing about. ex. "Science good or evil in Frankenstein."
    • 05/12/2005
    • 22:40:36
    • Score: 0 out of 0 people found this comment useful.
  • Weak on the conclusion.

    A little weak on the conclusion with your personal experiance, but overall fine.
    • 05/12/2005
    • 22:36:10
    • Score: 1 out of 1 people found this comment useful.
  • Business culture?

    You tell us about what culture is but you don't talk about culture in business.
    • 25/10/2005
    • 17:29:40
    • Score: 0 out of 2 people found this comment useful.
  • Lacking conclusion.

    Lacking a strong conclusion, plus you need more info or quotes to support each side.
    • 25/10/2005
    • 17:27:20
    • Score: 0 out of 0 people found this comment useful.
  • Bad Stereotyping.

    This is not much of an essay, further more it is stereotyping the Chinese. At least get the facts straight since not all people spitt.
    • 21/10/2005
    • 18:15:49
    • Score: 29 out of 37 people found this comment useful.
  • Explain quotes.

    Explain indepth the quotes you're using don't just put it in there. And at the very least tell what happened to cause them to die since that one of the most important parts in "Romeo and Juliet."
    • 15/10/2005
    • 10:45:18
    • Score: 0 out of 0 people found this comment useful.
  • Great Essay.

    Very well done, I liked the essay alot. Very informative.
    • 14/10/2005
    • 15:09:40
    • Score: 1 out of 2 people found this comment useful.
  • Better title.

    For one you need a better title, and second you need to elaborate a bit more on that other sense.
    • 14/10/2005
    • 15:08:38
    • Score: 1 out of 1 people found this comment useful.
  • Too short.

    Too short.
    • 13/10/2005
    • 18:40:01
    • Score: 0 out of 0 people found this comment useful.
  • Stick to the topic.

    Stick to writing about the atmosphere, don't stray off writing about tornadoes, lightning etc..And if you're going to talk about lightning get some of the facts straight.
    • 13/10/2005
    • 18:21:53
    • Score: 0 out of 0 people found this comment useful.
  • Interesting.

    Interesting, but it would be better if you were to tell some facts for safety.
    • 13/10/2005
    • 18:18:44
    • Score: 5 out of 5 people found this comment useful.
  • Needs more facts.

    You're just stating facts, you need to tell more about employee privacy laws and give a more indepth facts about how or what companies do in terms of monitoring the aativities of their employees and the action they take.
    • 13/10/2005
    • 14:37:51
    • Score: 0 out of 0 people found this comment useful.
  • Elaborate.

    You need to give more reasons to why someone would want to buy a dog or a cat. The reasons you have given aren't sufficient enough for someone to buy either a dog or a cat. You need to tell more about buying a dog as a pet could mean for a family. Especialy if the family has children. The same idea applies to buying a cat too. Plus you must also think of dog or cat breeds that can live with the owner.
    • 13/10/2005
    • 14:28:46
    • Score: 0 out of 0 people found this comment useful.
  • Insightfull.

    This essay gives an insightfull look at how Child Abuse laws can be manipulated and how it can affect the upbringing of a child.
    • 13/10/2005
    • 14:22:02
    • Score: 0 out of 0 people found this comment useful.
  • Weak conclusion.

    A bit insightfull. You came on strong with your intro and body paragraph, but I felt that your conclusion was weak and lacking.
    • 13/10/2005
    • 14:18:42
    • Score: 2 out of 2 people found this comment useful.
  • Awesome

    Great essay, you take a solid stance for your beliefs and find great info and facts to support your thoughts.
    • 13/10/2005
    • 10:55:19
    • Score: 0 out of 1 people found this comment useful.
  • Short but well written.

    Short but well written, but I can't help but think that you could have given a bit more indepth examples. But otherwise good essay.
    • 13/10/2005
    • 10:53:26
    • Score: 0 out of 0 people found this comment useful.
  • Too Short.

    "Catcher in the Rye" is a very good novel, I find it hard to believe that you were able to write about it in an essay this short. The essay merely states the events that happened in the story. You don't talk about hidden meaning literary symbols are even connect the story to the real world.I feel you can do a much better job than this.
    • 12/10/2005
    • 20:33:03
    • Score: 1 out of 1 people found this comment useful.
  • Not an essay.

    This is not an essay summarizing the novel, all you're doing is recounting the events that happened in the story.
    • 05/10/2005
    • 16:11:55
    • Score: 0 out of 0 people found this comment useful.
  • Needs stong

    While most of the essay is good, you have a very weak intro and conclusion. Reading the essay I would have thought that you were telling a story, don't make the explanation to long, just tell what happened. And don't use a quoate as a concusion.
    • 14/07/2005
    • 10:28:19
    • Score: 0 out of 0 people found this comment useful.
  • Bio of Genghis Khan

    This essay is good, but you aren't mentioning key information regarding his childhood and rise to power. Plus it seems like you are rushing through a bit.
    • 16/06/2005
    • 19:05:52
    • Score: 0 out of 0 people found this comment useful.
  • Too short!

    This essay, if it can be called that, is too short. It's more like a statement or fact. Proper structuring is needed as well as a good conclusionVery poorly done
    • 15/06/2005
    • 22:01:45
    • Score: 3 out of 3 people found this comment useful.
  • To short

    This piece of writing is simply to short. It looks like its not finished
    • 06/06/2005
    • 21:15:10
    • Score: 1 out of 1 people found this comment useful.
  • Man on fire

    The essay seems too short to me, so I suggest that you add more detail. And as for the summary, you should wrap it up by combining the main ideas of the paragraphs.Oh. also make the title a bit larger so it'll stand out so that people can know its the title.
    • 06/06/2005
    • 21:12:23
    • Score: 1 out of 1 people found this comment useful.
  • Positive effects of television on young children

    Quite an informative essay, very well written. You give a solid argument as well as a good defence. But you seem to start off sentances very frequently with "the", try to find another word to substitute it with, so the essay will sound less repetitive.
    • 06/06/2005
    • 21:08:08
    • Score: 2 out of 2 people found this comment useful.
  • Computer Games, and Society

    This report is well written, but I suggest that you refrain from using "I"
    • 06/06/2005
    • 21:00:42
    • Score: 2 out of 4 people found this comment useful.