User Details For: emmae

Essay List
Comments List
  • Good for your level

    you could benefit from better use of description. make it more interesting for people to read. otherwise, clear presentation of facts etc, but some paragraphs were too short, some too drawn out. paragraph structure was reasonable and your essay flowed well, but i would have appreciated more information in some areas and could have done with less in other areas.
    • 15/07/2003
    • 20:54:28
    • Score: 2 out of 2 people found this comment useful.
  • I agree with masterpuppet

    i agree with the paragraph structure comment. although you say you didnt realise the indents didnt convert, its a lot easier to read papers with a line between each paragraph, not just an indent. but either way. overall your paper is clear and concise, and very informative.
    • 15/07/2003
    • 20:51:59
    • Score: 9 out of 13 people found this comment useful.
  • Good

    this is a well written essay, but pretty average when you consider your level of education. it presents to me like a last minute essay. sorry if it isnt.your paragraph structure is something you should probably work on. you were also somewhat repetitive.on the whole, exceedingly average... nothing special.
    • 15/07/2003
    • 20:44:50
    • Score: 2 out of 2 people found this comment useful.
  • ...................

    very informative, simple easy to read structure and language.
    • 15/07/2003
    • 20:29:16
    • Score: 2 out of 2 people found this comment useful.
  • ...

    enviable writing skills. remains relevant throughout and keeps the readers attention.
    • 15/07/2003
    • 20:21:25
    • Score: 4 out of 4 people found this comment useful.
  • Very very good

    too many commas. e.g. "That ability, is proof of ... " when it should have just been "That ability is proof of ..."otherwise very good.
    • 15/07/2003
    • 20:17:15
    • Score: 1 out of 1 people found this comment useful.
  • ...

    appropriate to your level of education. appropriate length, good grammar, sentence structure, paragraph structure, impressive use of vocabulary and overall an interesting read.
    • 15/07/2003
    • 20:11:45
    • Score: 1 out of 1 people found this comment useful.
  • ...

    impressive and informative, but repetitive.
    • 15/07/2003
    • 20:03:57
    • Score: 2 out of 2 people found this comment useful.
  • Lot of potential

    you've got potential, but your sentence structure is weak. not too impressive for the grade level you claim to have received. nice descriptions, but some of the language you used is obviously a bad attempt to add some sort of realism to the story.
    • 15/07/2003
    • 19:57:50
    • Score: 3 out of 3 people found this comment useful.
  • ...

    extremely well written, maintains the interest of the reader throughout. impressive sentence and paragraph structure, as well as good grammar etc.
    • 14/07/2003
    • 23:36:33
    • Score: 2 out of 2 people found this comment useful.
  • Monotonous

    monotonous, but very well written for year 9 standard.
    • 14/07/2003
    • 23:34:04
    • Score: 1 out of 1 people found this comment useful.
  • Impressive

    very relevant and well written, but to a (mostly) uneducated reader, monotonous to read.
    • 14/07/2003
    • 23:31:21
    • Score: 4 out of 4 people found this comment useful.
  • Fascinating

    fascinating and a very appropriate length. maintains readers interest throughout. well written.
    • 14/07/2003
    • 23:28:34
    • Score: 2 out of 2 people found this comment useful.
  • Very good

    very interesting, but too long to really stay interested unless you are already interested in the topic (and how many people truly are? in the sense of literature) however, extremely well written and you present some fascinating ideas.
    • 14/07/2003
    • 23:21:41
    • Score: 3 out of 3 people found this comment useful.
  • Very informative

    very informative, but lacks any real depth in relation to your own point of view. your essay would be a lot easier to read if your paragraphs were shorter. it's difficult for a lot of people to read large blocks of writing and keep focused.
    • 14/07/2003
    • 23:19:44
    • Score: 2 out of 2 people found this comment useful.
  • Fantastic

    very entertaining!!you really dont answer any of your own questions, which might make someone wonder what your real purpose is.. is this essay just about the use of rhetoric to obscure a lack of content?
    • 14/07/2003
    • 23:14:39
    • Score: 3 out of 4 people found this comment useful.
  • Fantastic!

    expresses a great knowledge and understanding of the themes in the book, well written, good grammar, enviable sentence and paragraph structure and also a wide vocabulary!
    • 14/07/2003
    • 23:10:03
    • Score: 5 out of 5 people found this comment useful.
  • Very personal

    this is a very personal essay, basically expressing only your own opinion. grammar and basic english skills lacked in some parts of the essay.
    • 14/07/2003
    • 22:58:23
    • Score: 1 out of 2 people found this comment useful.
  • Good

    very informative, but i found it slightly boring because of the dominance of FACTS. meaning anyone could have put this essay together, not much thought needed to go into it. however, thats what a report is, so its very good.
    • 14/07/2003
    • 22:56:11
    • Score: 10 out of 11 people found this comment useful.
  • Great

    very good essay, clear and concise, but obviously biased towards capitalism. a more critical viewpoint, presenting both arguments (in relation to the political dilemma in the book, not the book itself) would have shown more understanding of the topic.
    • 14/07/2003
    • 22:51:44
    • Score: 4 out of 4 people found this comment useful.
  • Fantastic

    great! easy to follow, good concise sentence and paragraph structures, good grammar and followed accepted essay or report structure.
    • 14/07/2003
    • 22:48:11
    • Score: 4 out of 4 people found this comment useful.
  • Plato

    i like this essay, it uses simple wording and explains the story well. however the sentence structure could be improved.. some parts of the essay had to be read more than once to be understood fully. also, the style of writing is more narrative than essay.
    • 14/07/2003
    • 20:57:41
    • Score: 6 out of 7 people found this comment useful.
  • Good

    this essay is relevant, and goes into detail, but the author could have provided a more critical view, especially of american actions. many people believe that america is intervening in iraq only to secure iraqs huge oil reserves, and is using the womd excuse to justify their actions. this point of view could have been researched and noted more widely.
    • 14/07/2003
    • 20:49:48
    • Score: 3 out of 4 people found this comment useful.