The sun has set and I hang up the smile I've worn all day. Though I will make sure that it is the first thing I put back on in the morning because, just in case it is "that day," I want her to see me at my very best. I do the normal routine, eat dinner, get cleaned up, write -- the usual stuff. I lay down hoping to fall asleep quickly so my new day will hurry up and arrive. A new day with a brand new sun. But as I lay there and wait for the world to turn half way around, I think about her. And sometimes I smile, and sometimes that smile will turn into a snicker, and then often that snicker will turn into a burst of laughter. And then there are times I get that lump in my throat and that tight feeling in my chest, and sometimes that feeling overwhelms me and begins to turn into a tear, and often that tear multiplies itself and I can no longer fight the feeling and I lose the battle.
Then somehow through either joy or sadness, I drift and find myself asleep. Then the dreams begin and keep me company until my new day arrives. When I awake it's with such excitement! Because I tell myself this could be the day that every other day has led up to and the first day of the rest of my life. I quickly dawn my smile because I do so want her to see me at my very best. Then I look out the window even though I know it's dawn, but I still have to confirm I've been given another chance to find her. And there it is, the sun. Even when it's cloudy,