As I look around at the warm comfort of my home, the home I have known and loved for so long, I find myself consumed with thoughts of my own identity. I know that I am known, that they know about me, of me, but I also know that my impact will not truly be felt until I make that final decision, the decision to present myself to the world.
For what seems like eternity now I have pondered my decision, weighed up the pros, the cons, prioritised and had many sleepless nights. This choice if chosen would mean I would have to leave the comfort of my home, only to be exposed to the cold, harsh reality of the world. I ask myself if this recognition is worth the pain? I will no longer be independent, safe, warm and content, although, I will be recognised! Is it all worth it? These are the questions which have ran through my head daily, for as long as I can remember.
Comfort
Deutsch: Filzhut
English: Illustration of the pain pathway in René...Ultimately the choice of how I accept my fate is mine and this possible future pain of reality could not possibly compete with the tears I cry, night after night. Tears which long for the feeling of importance, tears which long for a family, to be part of a family, to be someone, anyone.
This pain, this hurt, these tears are becoming unbearable and I know now is the time that I must begin my journey. Pushing through the obstacles which block my way, I realise no matter what happens I can not turn back, not now, not ever! Slowly, I begin to push the boundaries, stretch the limits and go ahead with full force; nothing is going to stop me now.
However, this journey isn't as easy as...