Unwanted Intimacy

Essay by chillemagooHigh School, 10th gradeA+, August 2008

download word file, 4 pages 0.0 1 reviews

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Make cancer seem like an abusive father.

When you are told you may die. This was my lifeNo-one else seemed to notice just how much I was affected by this shadow in my life. I knew this thing I lived with was part of me and would be with me always. We learnt in school that if we believed enough anything could happen but I knew my case was different.

To be only fifteen and already know my life partner could be seen as lucky but it is a curse. To have to deal with a relationship beyond my years is hard. I feel strained, lost, alone. He is always there, none of my memories would be mine without him yet I wish I could make him leave.

She didn’t know what was happening, not really, but her love was the light that kept me going.

He would pack his bags again and a gain; but each time he came back it was better because I knew that there was more to life than him and his fear and his pain.

It was not beating him but knowing that I could that has made me strong. I am whole without him, disease free. The cancer is gone.

When you are told you may die. When you are told your heart will cease to beat, your breath catching in your throat, that your soul will stop dancing, what is it that you are left holding? I think of my cancer as being an unpredictable best friend, rather than an enemy or a mere acquaintance. A best friend that forgets to give and only takes, one of those relationships that end up hurting the more passive of the two. My secret love affair with cancer, my occasional flings with death and...