To The Man I Sometimes Call Dad

Essay by sweetandyummyJunior High, 9th gradeF, September 2004

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I lie awake at night

And converse with the darkness.

We discuss many things,

The blackness and I.

We had an interesting conversation

The other night.

I have been wondering lately

What it would be like

To be someone other than me.

If I were more like her,

Would you still Hate me?

If I weren't like me,

Would you realize that you produced two?

Could you know that we are equal,

Although not the same?

Could you be that open-minded?


Is it possible for you to see me

As the woman I've become,

Rather than the girl

You once knew?

I've overcome many obstacles,

Climbed many mountains,

Achieved many dreams;

But still you refuse to respect me.

You tell me that I'm worthless,

That I won't amount to much.

You call me a loser

I Cannot take it any longer!

I will fight back this time.

But am I Strong enough

To fight that which makes me weak?


I will continue to let you belittle me

And treat me like a fool,

Like I am merely a stepping stone

On your path of destruction.

You tell me to respect you

But how can I respect a man

Who doesn't respect himself?

I can't honor and obey you

Like a true DAD should be treated.

Because in these past seventeen years,

You have never been a "Dad" to me.

You are only my guardian, my provider -

Not my Dad.

You've provided me with the basics,

What I need now is for you to help me;

Love, Laugh, be Free,

Live every moment to the Fullest.

Until you can fulfil that need,

I will let the darkness

Heal my wounded soul,

Because you never learned how.